“You will never be free until you free yourself from the prison of your own negative thoughts or fearful energies.”
Found a perfectly quiet, secret place in nature where silence is the golden rule, voices hush to whispers. Opportunity to see how judgmental thoughts made life painful.
Surprisingly, remembered how recent loud noisy music played by neighbour and late night drunken knocks at my door really scared, angered, frustrated, upset me.
How can they play loud music? What kind of horrible, inconsiderate people? After mentally torturing self for 30 minutes, finally had a flash of mindfulness. Asked what was really bothering me? The music? Neighbour? Torturous friends? Why play?
The music in fact was enjoyable, wasn’t painful. Love Led Zeppelin, Metallica, Nirvana. What was upsetting was my mental story – why they shouldn’t be playing music and how this made me a ‘real victim’.
Mentally fearful, already prepared for disturbing thoughts each night! Pre-programmed, pre-set. Adopted a fear-based mindset like hot potatoes. Our own low-vibrational thoughts or uninformed external opinions have real emotional power, control over us.
Keep us stuck in unfulfilling spaces to satisfy basic survival mode or instincts, rather than inspire us to be open and expressive. Unwilling to step out of comfort zones, experience unfamiliar. Feel not good enough for life’s blessings and special gifts.
Started making a list of other recurring thoughts that disturbed me. Fearful patterns rehashed my whole life, allowing them to steal my happiness over and over.
We have two main modes of thinking (everything else is a subset). These are ‘want, love, dream, desire’ and ‘aversion, resentment, fear, resistance’.
My life’s agonising list – wish hadn’t said or done that, what if it’s risky, don’t want to try, want to be alone, want to reject. Suppressing or withholding precious, positive emotions to fan painful thoughts (fated past. No bearing on present/future, learnings to improve).
Ineffective strategies. Problem was ‘ME’, not others or outcomes. In a victim, pitiful or lack mentality – don’t deserve an expansive existence.
Something big happened. Quickly wrote it all down, pulled out these little devils to the surface, burnt all negative triggers to ashes. Transmuted pain into compassionate power. So much peace of mind and heart.
Now, want to be different. Truly balanced to intuitively experiment, connect with what deeply resonates. Find and achieve everything truly desired, needed to be happier! Free, receptive, fun, light, limitless, playful, unconditional.
How do we let go of negative thoughts or doubts? Honest self-realisations of loss or pain such pre-set harmful judgements, fearful thoughts have caused. Tear out self-destructive drama, denial or self-deception. Delete old, obsolete programming. Move forward.
A ‘prisoner of mind’ isn’t free to appreciate, engage or choose even simplest of things – freely explore, admire sky and birds, touch the trees, waterfalls and flowers, feel warmth of the sun, openly move with breeze of the wind.
We stay in our ‘mental conditioned prisons’ because we think we don’t have the keys or capability to break free. But we surely, absolutely do. Life’s really beautiful, wonderful. Each day brings a new reality, a new beginning.
We’re worthy and deserving of best life has to offer. Trust we are the best, for sure!
2019, bring it on!
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