What do you call a kid who doesn’t believe in Santa? A rebel without a Claus.
Why is Christmas just like your job? You do all work and fat guy with a suit gets all credit.
” Where’s your Christmas Spirit?” Is it so wrong to point out to our liquor cabinet?
3 guys who died on Christmas Eve, went to heaven. St. Peter at gates, “show something that represents Christmas”. 1st guy pulls out a lighter for candles. 2nd guy pulls out a set of jingling keys like bells. 3rd guy pulls out a pair of woman’s panties. St. Peter asked what does it have to do with Christmas? 3rd guy “Oh these are Carol’s.”
Why is Santa so jolly? Because he knows where all naughty girls live!
Why shouldn’t you mess with Santa? Because he has a black belt.
What do you call an obnoxious reindeer? RUDEolph.
Which Christmas Carol is a favorite of parents? Silent Night.
What do you call Santa if he also lives in the South Pole? Bi-Polar.
The 4 stages of life: 1. You believe in Santa Claus. 2. You don’t believe in Santa Claus 3. You dress up as Santa Claus 4. You look like Santa Claus!